I Now Can See The Colors in A Crystal

The_Crystal_Gallery_purple_and_white_crystal

I recently met for brunch with a highschool friend.  A couple of times during the past ten years she has felt compelled to reach out to me and we were finally able to connect. Once you read her story you will understand like I do now, that she is a product of our God who is so merciful to those who are in capivitiy and His desire is for our freedom.

She was rescued and released from a life full of heartache and torment.  God, has released her to a very happy ending… Below is her Cinderella Released story:

I Now Can See The Colors In A Crystal – Janice Conley
shared with her permission

Sharing my story with others is something I always hoped I would do. When I felt like I was losing control of my mind, ending up in ICU from an overdose and ending up in a psychiatric unit twice at two different hospitals, I could not imagine anyone being encouraged by my testimony!

As we all know there is a stigma attached to mental illness. 19 years ago I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. This brain disorder causes severe mood changes, elevated activity and extreme anxiety. People with this condition experience episodes of heightened energy followed by low energy and depression. The depression can last for weeks, months or even years. This is part of who I am today. I am not ashamed of it and I don’t let it define me or get in the way of living life. With the help of God, my husband, my family, my therapist, my psychiatrist and my close friends, I have learned to manage this illness. It takes a village!

I grew up in Sanford, Florida and accepted a job with a family owned business at the age of 22. This company was exactly where I needed to be. I received support and understanding from the owners and my co-workers during my difficult days. Early on, no one including myself, understood my illness.  Being in a supportive environment and feeling accepted and loved is critical to healing. I worked 30 years for this company. 22 of those years I was in a management position. I have always believed in God, however, during my teenage years and career I did not have a personal relationship with Jesus. Looking back, I see His hand in everything.

Due to manic highs and depressive lows, life can be chaotic with bipolar disorder. Often times relationships and careers are destroyed because of the irrational behavior that is displayed. This illness is often misunderstood by family, friends and co-workers. It is common for those who suffer to deny they have it or to resist treatment. I desperately wanted to feel mentally healthy and it took 11 years of determination and persistence to find the right help. My life is so different now that I have learned to manage it with correct medications and occasional therapy.

At the age of 32, during my first marriage, we built a house. During the construction process I became stressed, not sleeping and filled with anxiety. I felt like I was losing control of my mind. I made an appointment with my family physician who referred me to my first psychiatrist.

She diagnosed me with anxiety and depression and prescribed an antidepressant. When there was no improvement she prescribed another set of medications. These medications didn’t work so I quit taking them. For the next 11 years I felt anxious, depressed and empty, I knew there was something terribly wrong with me. My world was black and my spirit was dark. In sharing my concerns with family and friends, no one understood.

During this difficult time a friend invited me to church. Worshipping in a Pentecostal church was very different from my Lutheran background. It was there at the age of 34 that I walked the aisle to accept Jesus as my Lord and Savior. However, I did not grow as a Christian at that time. Due to the nature of my illness, I struggled with sadness, negative thoughts and difficulty focusing. “Negative thoughts deplete your faith, your energy and your enjoyment for life.” (Joel Osteen) It took all of my energy to just get by day to day.

At the age of 37 I divorced my first husband. I continued seeking counseling, hoping with each therapist my quality of life would improve. I was on and off medications during this time and nothing seemed to take away the depressed, anxioius empty feelings. Some days were more tolerable than others but I knew that people were not supposed to feel this way. I became frustrated. I was persistent in searching for help but couldn’t find the help that I needed.

One of my best friends, Cheryl, asked me if I could see the colors in a crystal. I explained to her that I could not see the colors in a crystal. Everything in my life was dull. She had never had a depressed day in her life so she could not understand the feelings that come with depression. I explained that in the morning when I opened my eyes I felt a gray cloud over me. This gray cloud followed me throughout the day. I would smile and laugh on the outside but I was dying on the inside. My only relief was sleeping. This was not the way I wanted to live my life.

At the age of 42 my life became intolerable. I felt alone and desperate. I did something totally out of character. I went to dinner at a diner by myself and sat on a stool at the counter hoping to meet someone. The only person who acknowledge my presence was the server. I left feeling more alone and desperate. That evening I made a very serious attempt to take my life with pain pills (prescribed for dental work) and alcohol. Fortunately, when I did not show up for work the next day a friend/co-worker had a concern and dame to my home. I was rushed to the emergency room. I spent nine days in the hospital. Four of those days in ICU in a coma. Three days in a regular room and two days in the psychiatric unit.

After I was released from the hospital my mind and body were fragile. Every aspect of my life was rocky, however I knew I had to walk back into my life. I had to face family, friends and co-workers and try to put the pieces back together. It was not easy but I knew this had to be done. Most everyone was understanding and supportive which allowed me to begin to heal.

I finally realized to have a good life I needed to be mentally healthy. To manage mental illness there are two types of doctors needed. A psychologist for counseling and a psychiatrist to prescribe medications. At this point, a team was crucial for me so I found a team that I felt comfortable with. As a signle working girl, I knew this was going to be expensive. My insurance plan covered medication but not therapy sessions. I also realized it was important for me to establish a relationship with these doctors early on so that they will be readily available to me when I needed them. Even though it was expensive, I comitted to weekly therapy sessions. This was an important step to getting my life back on track.

A manic or depressive episode can occur without warning at any time and at any age. Sometimes during an episode I need the help of my doctors. It is important to have a relatlionship established to get an immediate appointment. One could wait up to a month to get in to see a doctor. Even in my later years I will need to keep a relatlionship with my doctors current.

A year after my suicide attempt, I had a manic episode that left me feeling totally out of control. I believed I was making a movie about my life. This movie was to help others with bipolar disorder. My friend, Hamp who is now my husband, came over for an early morning jog. I suggested we have coffee and visit instead of jogging. I had a sleepless night and my energy level was heightened so he knew something was wrong. When he left my home, he called Cheryl and asked her to check on me. As soon as she saw me she knew something was terribly wrong. My behavior was totally out of character. Hamp returned to my home. My conversation that morning was focused on the movie that was to be made. I had not been diagnosed with bipolar disorder so this conversation alarmed them. They called my family in. While we were all together, Hamp called my therapist. She said that I was not the person she had counseled the past year and I needed to go immediately to the psychiatric unit of the hospital. She said if I would not agree to go call the police to escort me. It was imperative that I be admitted that day. This was my second stay in a psychiatric unit.

This manic episode was the turning point which allowed my therapist and psychiatrist to correctly diagnose me with bipoloar disorder. It is not uncommon for a correct diagnosis to take many years, sometimes decades. For 11 years I was diagnosed incorrectly and was prescribed wrong medication. It was a relief to finally get a diagnosis. I currently take two medications. The combination works well for me.  I have been on these now for 19 years. In the beginning I had a few side effects but they went away after a little while. The only lasting side effect was some weight gain. Correct medications have made a huge difference for me. I realized early on how important it is to take my pills daily. I accept that I will be on medication for the rest of my life. The pills help balance my moods and provide me with a mentally healthy lifestyle.

Even though I am on the right medications, I will occasionally get out of balance. It is important to have a good support system. When I begin to experience a manic episode, my husband can see a change in my eyes. Once I recognize my elevated mood, I meediately adjust my medications before my life spins out of control. To his day, when I am in a manic state my sense of urgency to help others by sharing my story becomes my main focus. Together Hamp and I have learned to manage these episodes. He is always there to watch my back when my world gets rocky. My life will continue to get rocky at times and it is comforting to know he is always looking out for my best interest.

Mos of us have famlily members or friends who suffer from a mental illness. If you know someone who has been diagnosed with a mental illness be sympathetic and understanding and know that it is challenging for them. Signs of the illness can occur at any time and without warning. With each episode I experience, I learn more about how to manage my change in moods and stay in control.

With therapy, prayer and reading books on healing I have been able to work through most of my issues, including child sexual abuse. I finally feel whole! I have seen God’s goodness in amazing ways. He has richly blessed my life with a loving, supportive husband and family.

In 2010 we became part of a wonderful church family. This is when I began my relationship with Jesus. I now look back on my life and see God’s hand in everything. He brought me out of the dark days into the brighter days. When your life is dark, know that it is temporary. In His time, He will bring you back into the light. The sun will shine bright again for you someday. Do not lose hope. Isaiah 40:31 “But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow wearly, they will walk and not faint”.

God is a God of second chances and it is by His grace that I am alive today. My life is rich and full of His many blessings. This awareness is new to me and I feel like I have been born again! I am trusting God to lead my path. Proverbs 3:6 “In all of your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight.” My part is learning to trust Him.

I love sharing my story because I believe God will use it so that others ………..can see the colors in a crystal.

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Janice Conley

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Janice Conley

Janice has a program and visits churches with others who have been rescued from bi-polar disorder. If you would like to connect with her please email me at CinderellaReleased@gmail.com.

 

 

 

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Insecurity “I”s that will incinerate you!

Insecurity

No temptation[a] has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted[b] beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted,[c] he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.

Therefore, my dear friends, flee from idolatry. I Corinthians 10:13-14

Idolatry is putting anything or anyone before the Lord. It is a subtle form of insecurity. It is easy to try and please others, especially as Christians.  We will tell subtle lies in order not to hurt someone’s feelings, and we may read other’s actions as contrary to our own welfare, and make assumptions.

Both are traps….from the enemy.  The Corinthian church had these same issues.  The enemy will tempt us…. but God, said He has already taken care of this for us in advance!

Whenever we feel these things try to tempt us…. Run!  Insecurity will incinerarte you and God’s plans for you! Run from insecurity…. Run into the security of Jesus!

Blessings,

Cinderella Released…from ashes to beauty.

Inflammation “I”s that will Incinerate You

eye inflammation

I will heal my people and will let them enjoy abundant peace and security. Jeremiah 33: 6b (NIV)

The second phase of healing a wound (there are four) is inflammation. Inflammation means to ignite or set on fire. The process is part of our body’s defense system and actually helps to heal a wound or injury. After a wound has occurred (blood is clotting) the small blood vessels change and allow blood (plasma, blood proteins, and white cells) to enter the area around the injury – it swells. This increase in fluids (blood) accompanies or causes pain, Screen Shot 2015-07-02 at 11.39.12 AMloss of function, redness and a “hot to the touch” sensation. Discharging pus is a part of this process. We tend to try and control/stop inflammation but it is needed after a wound for healing; if inflammation does not get rid of the problem or continues that is chronic inflammation and can lead to other health issues.

The parallels of physical inflammation to spiritual inflammation are noteworthy. After the initial shock of a wound we will feel pain, possibly stop doing things, and be touchy; these are natural but it is because “life” (blood) is trying to flood back in. We may/should let loose bad stuff (pus) as part of our healing. In this stage if we don’t get rid of “stuff” it will stay around and cause other more serious problems or at least delay our healing.

∞ Lord Jesus, we know wounds will come but thank you for healing. Holy Spirit thank you for taking ALL things and using them to bring us closer to Jesus and the Father. Amen.

http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/248423.php

If you need prayer for healing… please don’t hesitate to give me a call at area code 850-661-6104 or email your prayer requests to cinderellareleased@gmail.com

 

Migration is within us – will we choose life or death?

migration

I don’t know about you but whenever I get stressed and don’t know what to do… I feel a migration movement coming on.  What I mean is I want to get up from where I am at and move to another place.  You’ve heard the grass is greener on the other side?  I’ve often wondered if this is attached to migration.  In the case of passing from this life to the next.  I do believe the grass is definitely greener on the other side, at least for me.

Whenever the Lord allows me to go back to Kenya my dream is to travel all around the perimeter of Kenya  and to see the great migration that occurs yearly.  It is a natural instinct for literally millions of animals who migrate from Kenya to Tanzania.  About Travel says,

The great annual migration of millions of zebra, wildebeest (gnu) and other antelope in East Africa tops almost every list of safari experiences. When you plan your trip, you’ll need information about the annual migration, the best times to witness this wildlife spectacle, where to stay, and when to see it in Kenya and Tanzania.

The Migration

Each year around 1.5 million wildebeest and 300,000 zebra (along with other antelope) gather up their young and start their long trek from Tanzania’s Serengeti Plains, further north to Kenya’s Masai Mara National Reserve. They go in search of food and water. Their journey runs in a clockwise circle and the animals cover a distance of around 1800 miles. It’s a tough journey, and every year an estimated 250,000 wildebeest don’t make it.

One of the most spectacular sights of the migration is when the herds gather to cross the Grumeti River (Tanzania) and the Mara River (Kenya) from July through September.

Psalm 23 reminds me of this distinct urge and how David must have felt when he was tending his flock and they had this sudden urge to migrate!  When are we comfortable with passing from one dimension into the other.  In David’s case he was hunted, betrayed, and pursued by his enemies in an attempt to keep him from his inheritance.  This was a position and place to which he had not yet arrived, yet I believe deep within him the urge to continue through trauma, stress and trials moved him to not give up and to pursue the unknown.  I wonder if he was choosing life here, and wanting what only death could bring… a migration to the other side where rest, peace and eternity reigns supreme.

Psalm 23

A psalm of David.

The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
    He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
    he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths
    for his name’s sake.
Even though I walk
    through the darkest valley,[a]
I will fear no evil,
    for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
    they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me
    in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
    my cup overflows.
Surely your goodness and love will follow me
    all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord
    forever.

The Brook, Valley and River of Kidron (Cedron)

1 Kings 2:371599 Geneva Bible (GNV)

37 For that day that thou goest out, and passest over the river of Kidron, know assuredly, that thou shalt die the death: thy blood shall be upon thine own head.

Nehemiah 2:151599 Geneva Bible (GNV)

15 Then went I up in the night by the brook, and viewed the wall, and turned back, and coming back, I entered by the gate of the valley, and returned.

Jeremiah 31:401599 Geneva Bible (GNV)

40 And the whole valley of the dead bodies, and of the ashes, and all the fields unto the brook of Kidron, and unto the corner of the horsegate toward the East, shall be holy unto the Lord, neither shall it be plucked up nor destroyed anymore forever.

It is interesting to study about this brook and valley and the filled and unfulfilled prophecies.  You can read about the first and last time this brook and valley are mentioned Click here.

The darkest valley is spoken about in scripture.  Before you come to it you must go over the brook of Kidron.  David walked over it, Nehemiah, Jeremiah….then finally Jesus and his disciples on the way to the garden of Gethsemane on the night he was betrayed. The famous song says, “we all have to walk that lonesome valley by ourselves.”  Migration comes to us all to make that walk from this life to the next.  I have chosen to walk in the way of Jesus.  He went before me, but He is still with me.

If you would like to learn more about the Journey Jesus took over the Brook of Cedron I would be happy to share with you, your small or large group!  Email me at CinderellaReleased@gmail.com

Psychologists, Sin and The Fall of Mankind

Dear Professor,

I do have a lot of thoughts about the theories of Developmental Psychology, Sin and The Fall of Man. It is funny you asked!

The Lord has spoken to me a lot about the fall of man and how “perfect” Adam and Eve and the first humans were on this earth. The earth was perfect at one time also, supplying every developmental, physical, emotional and spiritual need mankind had or would ever have. They were perfectly content, at peace and in divine health. Just after the fall of mankind, there wasn’t as much sin and evil as has “evolved” for lack of a better term, and men/women lived for almost a thousand years – even in their fallen state.

In that glorious day, when we will live and work in the “Millennial Reign” with Jesus there will be the absence of Satan and his workers. They will be bound. There will still be free will. Unfortunately, there will be those who will choose to reject God and Jesus, the Messiah.

We will live in this time period established by God for a thousand years on the earth! Thinking about this makes me so excited!

I have been working with several processes to help individuals with addictive behaviors because they get “stuck” attaching to unhealthy things and aren’t able to overcome addictions because they are mentally and in some cases physically attached. Unless the Lord delivers them instantly and renews their mind instantly when they get saved, they get “stuck” when certain patterns of behavior is triggered.

The brain has two parts, but the amygdala which is on the right side( especially our joy center) stimulates hormone production. When we are stimulated our mind reverts back to the rhythms of joy and quiet we learned as a child. These patterns set in place our balance of security and healthy and unhealthy attachments. If the child isn’t nurtured properly, or is abused, etc. they later attach to behaviors, things (food, drugs, sex, alcohol, excitement, danger), instead of attaching to the love of God.

This starts a downward spiral because the stimulation along with the form of medication causes or brain and body to become unbalanced. We have to have more of the stimulation to produce more of the “high” we get. We truly are what we feed our body, mind and spirits.
http://www.lifemodel.org/TRYL.php?page=restarting

Joy Recovery Specialist
CinderellaReleased@gmail.com

These muscles tighten when we are stressed, fearful, incur trauma or injury.

Another issue on biological side is in regards to muscle memory. Our muscles especially the psoas and sternum muscles (which are in our pelvis and protect our most vital organ have the natural instinct to reflex and tense when we become defensive or are faced with fear, stress and anything involving in trauma. This causes much stress in our bodies, which in turn produces a lot of illness. Animals naturally release the tension, where we have learned to mask our reflexes and thus tons of stress is carried and memorized in our muscles.Releasing this stress, tension, trauma causes the muscles, fascia and organs to release the tension we were never created to carry.

A relatively new procedure is being used in areas of great affliction and trauma to help first responders, war veterans and victims release the trauma their bodies are holding. I train my clients to release this trauma/tension that is stored and people are recovering from illnesses, and chronic stress related illnesses.

Contact me for coaching you!

http://traumaprevention.com/.

I believe if we as Christians can join the effort to help those find “complete wholeness” through the gospel while helping them cope with the effects of the fall of mankind, we can really make an impact in our world.

Jesus said, “We would do greater things.” I believe we can as a unified body moving by and in His Spirit.

One of the quotes in our reading that really hit me and I couldn’t find it now that I am writing this, but it stated that once science took over and it could basically validate everything on the earth there would be no need for religion. What struck me was, The King of Kings and Lord of Lords and Scientist of Scientists, Mighty God, Our Savior is coming and when He comes it won’t matter what men think they have discovered or understand.

Our knees will bow at His arrival and our “spirits” will be redeemed unto Him and then we will receive our “healed and glorified” bodies that were or are wracked with the wages of sin for thousands of generations back to the fall.

When He returns, sickness, illness, etc. will have to flee for us forever!

Dr.’s, scientists and others can discover many ways to help people recover from injury, illness, and stress. We can help people to retrain their brains, release tension and medicate to relieve pain but the reality is that the only true wholeness is finding a relationship with Christ.

When I truly put Jesus first His presence prevails, even now while I am writing this. I am no where near where I want to be in my relationship with Christ, but my prayer each day is to help me find ways, to be in places where I can share Him to a hurting world and know Him more fully.

I talk to and read about people who have literally walked through hell on earth and their psyche is whole, completely whole, not that they are perfect – yet!

In her book, Tramp For The Lord, Corrie Ten Boom recalls,

“Roll call sometimes lasted three hours and every day the sun rose a little later and the icy-cold wind blew a little stronger. Standing in the grey of the dawn I would try to repeat, through shivering lips, that verse of Scripture which had come to mean so much to me: ‘Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? As it is written, for thy sake we are killed all the day long; we are accounted as sheep for the slaughter.’”

When all is said and done, thousands upon thousands of individuals, body, soul and spirit will be changed. The vilest of vilest have been forgiven because of their faith which is something that can’t be proven, seen or verified experimentally. When our names are called on the roll up yonder, what a day that will be!

Register now for CinderellaReleased…from ashes to beauty Recovery Class

Joy Recovery” Groups

The holidays will be here soon…take time for yourself!

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Wednesday, September 19th 11:30 a.m. – 1:00 p.m.
 -Villas Drive Location (Bring Sack Lunch) 

Wednesday, September, 19th, 6:30 p.m. – 8:00 p.m.
   Villas Drive Location (Dinner Plans TBA)

You were created to live a joyful life. We will begin a six week Bible based recovery program.  I will be helping you learn to retrain your brain, through prayer, joy recovery exercises, storytelling, writing exercises, art & music therapy, scripture verses and lots of laughing!. We will be covering areas dealing with finding your purpose, recovering your identity in Christ, physical, emotional and spiritual healing including compassion fatigue.  This class is great for individuals in ministry, caretaking jobs, and their spouses.  A donation of $15.00 per person is requested per class. (Four weeks requested prior to starting class and balance due on Week 5).  Limited scholarships available.  Class fills up quickly…So please reserve your spot no later than August 24th in order to prepare materials.

Location:
 
262 S. Villas Drive
Tallahassee, Florida 32303