I grew up in the 60’s and 70’s where there were two types of love being expressed in our country:
1) Free love and
2) then unconditional Jesus’ love.
The Jesus movement was an Evangelical Christian movement beginning on the West Coast of the United States in the late 1960s and early 1970s and spreading primarily throughout North America, Europe, and Central America, before subsiding by the late 1980s.
I accepted Jesus in 1967 at the age of 12 in a Christian Missionary Alliance church. I had dreams of becoming a missionary, wanted to end prejudice, slavery and the arpartheid.
My plan was to go to Tocoa Falls Bible College and Seminary. I believe this was God’s plan. I was fortunate to have really good pastors and teachers and I devoured the Bible throughout Junior High and most of High School. I had parts of Revelation memorized and could tell you every cult and occult company and celebrity that existed at the time. I was labeled a Jesus Freak.
The summer of my junior year, I switched from Jesus Love to the Free Love camp, the country western version. As the saying goes sin had it’s pleasure for a season. Today 50 years after first accepting Christ, I still grieve this decision. Not only has it cost me a lot of pain, it has cost many others pain because of my poor witness. I also regret the time that was lost in being able to share with others the joy that only salvation can bring to a hurting soul.
The Good News is that God’s plan never changed. His plan for each and everyone of us is for good and not for evil. He didn’t give up on me because I made a stupid choice. He was there waiting for me to return just like the Father was waiting for his prodical son to come home. Like me, the prodical took his inheritence and squandered it on the “Free Love” life. What I’ve come to realize is this is Satan’s plan. He wants us to fall, and believe we can never return home. I believe that many are caught in this same lie. But I’ve learned once you choose Jesus Christ, He will pursue you throughout forever. He will allow you to live in your mess until you are ready to come home.
This is Satan’s plan. He wants us to fall, and he also wants us to believe we can never return home. I believe that many today are caught in this same trap. It is a lie. God is always waiting and wanting us to be in relationship with Him. He will allow you to live in your mess until you are ready to come home.
I can tell you my life radically changed after my third son was born. I became discontent with my lifestyle. I wanted joy back, and God used him to show me what unconditional love was all about. He used this particular son to remind me that God loved more, than I could ever imagine. This put a deep desire and longing to return to the LORD.
I wanted to change to be a good mother but I was bound in sin and was powerless to deliver myself. Then one day He nearly died as a result of my sin. I can’t tell you God’s voice was literally audible, but it was so soft, but supernaturally powerful. When He spoke to me that day His words literally shook the core of my soul. He said, “Marlene, It’s time,” my knees buckled as if I had been hit in the back of my legs with a baseball bat. I knew that my time of running was over. I wanted to change and begged God to let my son live. I tried bargaining with God and He immediately let me know, that I didn’t have anything to bargain with. Jesus had already paid the price for all of my sins, past, present and future. All he wanted was my love and He would supply the rest. God removed a lot of weight that day, healed my son and my life has been forever changed.
When I heard these words my knees buckled as if I had been hit in the back of my legs with a baseball bat. My life flashed before my eyes, I couldn’t get to my son who had turned blue, but inside I knew that my time of running was over. In my spirit I knew I had a choice that day… Free Love or Jesus’ Love.
I wanted to change and begged God to let my son live and I then trying to take control of the situation I began bargaining with God. He immediately let me know, that I didn’t have anything to bargain with. The Holy fear that I felt wasn’t a terror, it was a respect and realization that Jesus had already paid the price for all of my sins, past, present and future. How dare I minimize the sacrifice. It was either accept His love, total forgiveness and a wiping away of every sin, being baptized anew in Jesus’ love.
All he wanted was my love and He would, could and did supply the rest. God removed a lot of weight that day, healed my son and my life has been forever changed.
I wish I could say everything is so perfect everyday and I never struggle or I’ve never sinned or been deceived by Satan. In the scripture above Jesus is warning the ones He trained while He was still on the earth that we need to be wise, know what we believe because there were going to be tough times ahead. Like the brothers and sisters who have gone before us, being a sold out, committed follower and disciple of Jesus Christ is not going to be easy.
Let your character [your moral essence, your inner nature] be free from the love of money [shun greed—be financially ethical], being content with what you have; for He has said, “I will never [under any circumstances] desert you [nor give you up nor leave you without support, nor will I in any degree leave you helpless], nor will I forsake or let you down or relax My hold on you [assuredly not]!” Hebrews 13:5 AMP
Searching for God’s Treasures,
Marlene has been called to go and serve others
wherever God calls her.
She combines teaching, prayer, worship
with the prophetic, words of knowledge and
wisdom to bring salvation, deliverance &
healing to those who are lost, hurting & sick.
from ashes to beauty…
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